Saturday, 31 January 2009



I’ve started playing this again. It’s not great, especially compared to UT2004 but It has enough good points to justify a few hours of play.


Still, the main campaign was god awful and the fact that Epic plagiarized their own characters is… well it’s shit xD


Ah well, I still enjoy a good old match of CTF or Instagib!

Thursday, 29 January 2009

A Productive Day

Oh yea! I finished an RPG today, can you believe it?


I really, REALLY enjoyed (Pauses for breath) Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness. It was a fantastic blend of humor, fresh game play and some truly fantastic artwork. In fact, I don’t think I’ve enjoyed a game this much in a long time. Bravo, Penny Arcade boys. Bravo.


In other news, Peggle has been confirmed for the PSN with trophies (something that made me beam with joy) and Quake Live is as epic as… well Epic. Speaking of Epic, they should really jump on the bandwagon and make a free to play browser based Unreal Tournament. I mean, that would rock.

Wednesday, 28 January 2009

An Epic Discovery

I just found out that on Command and Conquer Red Alert 3, there’s a proton cannon in Teddy Roosevelt's head in Mount Rushmore.


Do you NEED any other reason why to buy this game right now? I sure don’t!

Tuesday, 27 January 2009

A Classic Quote

"Playing a guitar is not a f***ing videogame"

-Noel Gallagher


You tell them Noel! God bless ya, who cares if you haven't even played the game. Your still an inspiration!

Monday, 26 January 2009

Er… Resi?

I had a massive long blog planned for today, because I got my hands on Resi 5 and really wanted to talk about it.


But I just went on Quake Live… and I honestly can’t remember what I was gonna write. All I can say is, I need to have literally just stopped playing it to do it justice. It’s immense!

Sunday, 25 January 2009

2 Kills, 2 Seconds


I really, REALLY like Quake Live. It’s fun, simple, and did I mention that it’s fun?


I don’t understand how it works. It’s completely Lag free, the graphics are superb and it has everything you would expect from a modern day shooter. Statistics, matchmaking, friend tracking, in game chat etc. I’m really impressed, because it all works.


If you can find a way of getting into the beta, then I recommended you exploit that right now. If you can’t, then wait for the release. You won’t be disappointed.

Saturday, 24 January 2009

Quake Live

A mate of mine gave me and a few other lads on the forum a Beta key for the much anticipated Quake Live Beta today.


I can’t really pass comment at the moment, because I haven't really played much of it yet. I have however, played Quake 3 and it’s amazing. I know this isn’t exactly the same, but It may as well be.


Full review tomorrow I would expect!

Friday, 23 January 2009

Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness Episode One

Bought this, this morning. To be honest, I kinda regretted it straight after because I hadn’t read… GOOD reviews for it. Just average ones. Still, it was already downloading so I sighed, set my PS3 to shut down after download and off I went to college.


I got home around 8, wandered down the local Tesco with a mate and got back around 9. I booted it up, sighed, and began playing.


Let me tell you, I love Penny Arcade. The web comic is funny as hell, and never fails to deliver off the wall yet true to life wit and humor. It’s a must read. No doubt my obsession with the web comic was one of the factors that led me to buying this game. So why was I so cynical about my purchase? Well firstly it’s an RPG and I don’t really do RPG’s… Also, it’s episodic. Meaning that no matter how long they claim it is, It just wont be.


As usual though, I ate my own words (for the record, they taste rather rich like fruitcake, and as you well know, fruitcake is the preffered choice of desert for a liar). I love this game. It’s around 6-8 hours long (or so I’ve heard), has a rather fresh combat system (it’s just the usual turn based, but it’s not as strict as Final Fantasy) and, best of all it is funny as hell. It really left me wetting myself with laughter. It’s brilliant.


The character creation system is pretty impressive as well. Your character appears in the cut scenes, fully animated in 2D. It’s rather clever!

Thursday, 22 January 2009

Hey Good Job ,There, Hardhat

I’m still off College (back tomorrow) so today I was once again bored out of my skull. After yesterdays fiasco (I ended up playing Left 4 Dead for a few hours) I decided to play Team Fortress 2. Man, has that thing gone… quiet.


It took me 15 minutes to find a server with ANYONE playing it, never mind one with a few people running around. The new quick view didn’t help. All of the ones I clicked led me to empty servers. Nice work Valve! Why don’t you add the Left 4 Dead server browser? I bet it improves it muchly!


Still, I got a game and played it for a while. It was fun I guess.

Wednesday, 21 January 2009

What Will Become Of Them?

I’ve had abdominal pain since Monday, and therefore haven't been to college since then this week. After visiting the Doctor this morning (in which a large portion of my Urine was stolen and my stomach was molested) It turns out I did something that pulled it, and therefore have to rest it. It was funny though, because she said I must have been over-exercising, to which I replied that I must have just excersised, because I haven't done any form of physical activity since I was born. Well, if you don’t include the Wii.


So basically, I’ve been bored. Very bored. Yesterday I managed to entertain myself by reading the whole back catalogue of Penny Arcade and by playing Far Cry 2, but today I was at a loss. So I looked under my bed. You know as you do. Under there, I found my Gamecube and my Playstation 1. I was overjoyed! The last time I played a Playstation game was Spyro, and that was before I got my PS3 in August last year. So I dug it out, plugged it in, played it for about 10 minutes then wandered off for food.


As I was making myself a sandwich, I couldn’t help thinking that in give or take 5 years time, it could my PS3 rotting under there. Maybe even an Xbox, or a PSP as well (hey, who knows what the future holds). It was odd, because I physically couldn’t imagine ideally looking under my Bed, or in a cupboard, and seeing a PS3  covered in dust, and feeling only mild nostalgia or quaint enthusiasm towards it. If I saw my PS3 in a cupboard today, I’d freak out. I payed too much for it. Hell I’m afraid to touch it half the time.


So there you go, a little something to think about. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m downloading Counter Strike and I still don’t know why.

Tuesday, 20 January 2009

Unreliable Washed Out Hypocrites, Very Nice

Nintendo are releasing a set of games under the title of the “New Play Control Range”.  Basically, Nintendo are porting Gamecube games to the Wii with the new control system plastered over the top.

The first two that will be released is Pikmin and Mario Tennis. Both of which have been dated to be in stores by the beginning of March.


Personally… I don’t know what to say. My gut reaction is to be angry at how Nintendo can’t even come up any new ideas for games and instead are porting old ones instead. However, the idea of playing Metroid Prime or Luigis Mansion with Wiimote is rather tempting, and of course it means they’ll be a lot more mainstream than they were back when they were first released. Still, it doesn't look like their getting a graphical update (I believe the screen above is a shot of the Wii version, and it still looks like an early Gamecube title) which is disappointing.


A final note, is this the Pikmin game Miyamoto announced at E3? If it is, then shame on you sir. You used to be a God.

Monday, 19 January 2009

Resident Evil 5 Demo!

Capcom has confirmed that the Resident Evil 5 demo will be on PSN from Monday, February 2 - over a month before the game's release on March 13.
That's exactly a week after the demo is due to hit Xbox Live, on Monday, January 26.

The demo includes two-player split-screen and two-player online gameplay and single-player with AI help.
Unlike the 360 demo, which will only be available to Gold XBL members for the first week (silver as of Feb 2), the PS3 demo will be free for all from day one so get stuck in.

I just wet myself.

Sunday, 18 January 2009

PixelJunk Monsters

I went on a pre-owned game hunt again yesterday, and after Thursdays outing felt rather confident that I’d find something decent and cheap. I didn’t. Well, not in stores anyway.


I was browsing the PS Store when a friend of mine recommended I buy a game called PixelJunk Monsters. I had a look and it was only a fiver with the expansion pack included so I bought it. Oh my god. It rocks.


Ever played Desktop Tower Defense? It’s the same principles, only twisted slightly to make it more appealing (and more enjoyable). It’s a casual game, but a good casual game. Brilliant to play for half an hour or so. It’s also clever, which is something you don’t often see on a game of this genre.


So yea, I recommend :P

Saturday, 17 January 2009

Hypocrites Of The World Unite

When it comes to gaming, I’m a hypocrite. In fact I'm really a well known one. I always used to slag off the PS3 and now I have one, and I constantly ripped the piss out of COD5 and I own that as well. For the PS3 no less!!


My mate always used to laugh at this, but today he bought Lord of the Rings Conquest and COD5, even though he always used to take the piss out of them.



Thursday, 15 January 2009

Advance Wars: DS

I used to have an unholy addiction to Advance Wars 2: Black Hole Rising on the GBA. Like, a major addiction. Today I bought this. If I disappear, this is why.

Wednesday, 14 January 2009

This Little Duck Hates Far Cry 2


Hey. Names Terrance. How you doing.


Before I start, let’s establish something. I’m a Duck. Not only am i a Duck however, I also play games. The thing is though, Duck’s are natural haters of everything (it’s true, Google it). I hate ponds, I hate dry land, I hate flying, but most of all I hate nearly every game I ever play. I’m like Yahtzee from zero punctuation, only I have a beak. Some say I'm nothing more than a metaphorical character created to release hidden hatred for videogames from someone else, but I think that’s bullshit.


So lately I’ve been playing Far Cry 2. Oh lord do I have problems with it. A lot of problems. For starters why is it that everyone seems to want to shoot me, and I mean everyone. I can’t drive four fucking feet before getting my face shot of by around 15 men who have been chilling at a bloody checkpoint all day, even though there’s another checkpoint about three foot up the road. It’s stupid. Also, they don’t like to die and my gun likes to jam. And fire likes to burn me. Ouch.


Also, the people on this game talk really fast. It’s like they can’t stop talking otherwise they’ll die. But then they do stop. And they don't die. Which is disappointing, because the missions they send me on are so repetitive I want them to drop down dead just to add a bit of variety.


The multiplayer's weak, all the vehicles are the same speed and always end up exploding, it crashes a lot, the buddy system works but has limited animations and the whole game is full of unlikeable characters. Also It’s made by Ubisoft.


I may post again, but it’s hard to type with wings. I do have a lot to say about Left 4 Dead however.





Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Lord Of The Rings Conquest

I played the Demo of this last…. Thursday? Yea must have been. It was… well. Broken. Even after an hour of play it still didn’t seem to play right. I know that sounds confusing, but the whole game just seems flawed and badly made.


I dunno, I wouldn’t recommended it but maybe the full products better?


What do I know :P

Monday, 12 January 2009

Sunday, 11 January 2009

Oh Great. Now It’s Zelda

An interesting patent has emerged for what appears to be Nintendo's next Zelda game, sparking concern (in our office anyway) that the famous adventure series is all about to go all "casual".
The patent, credited to Mario daddy Shigeru Miyamoto himself, describes an all-new hint system as well as a DVD-style scene selection option, for a dummy game called 'Legend of OO' (we wonder what that could be?!)

The three systems outlined by the patent (thanks to NeoGAF for translating the gibberish) seem to be the following:
Main game: Play through the game from start to end as normal with an optional hint system. Veteran players can enjoy the challenge while less experienced players can get an occasional helping hand.
Digest: The game shows important scenes in the game, both cut-scene and gameplay, in order (it basically plays itself). You have the option of stopping the digest at any time and playing the 'scene' yourself with relevant equipment and powers. You can't save the game in this mode.
Scenes: Play through any puzzle or 'scene' in the game with appropriate equipment and powers. A bit like a DVD movie's scene selection.

Miyamoto has already expressed the Zelda series' need to become more accessible to a broader group of players, stating that "lot of people who bought the Wii are not necessarily the types of people who are interested in playing that kind of game

." – CVG


This is why the Wii doesn't interest me anymore. Zelda, possibly one of the greatest game series ever made, has finally been given the full Wii treatment. It’s infuriating. I can’t believe it. Scene selection? On a Zelda game? Play through the game… but don’t play it? Why even put that option in! Just go on Youtube on the day of release… Gah


I’m annoyed. Honestly. Can’t even type. If anyone needs me I’ll be in the angry dome, playing Wind Waker and weeping.


Saturday, 10 January 2009

Five More Bioshocks

In a story running on, 2K president Christoph Hartmann says of the BioShock franchise, "If we spin it the right way and get the right twist of innovation, we can make six parts of it, as Star Wars did." Thankfully he also said that the company promises not to "cash in" on the BioShock franchise. – IGN


Friday, 9 January 2009

Ratchet and Clank: Size Matters (& 101'st post)

This, is probably one of the best handheld games I've ever played. Honest to God, it's amazing. Better than the near perfection that is Mario Kart. It is that good. Even though it's on my girlfriends PSP, and I have to nick it to play it. Oh well. Still great fun.
Also, yesterday was my 100th post. Woop. 100 days of blogging!

Thursday, 8 January 2009

Dawn of War 2


Just a short post today, but I am so very excited for this game I wee myself everytime I think of it.


Well maybe I’m not that excited for it.


Ok. Yes I am.

Wednesday, 7 January 2009

A World At War

I finished COD5 last night, and instead of giving you a straightforward answer, I’ve decided to eat my own words.


On the 28th of October 2008, I blogged about the “new Call of Duty” and what I thought about it. Now, I’m going to repost segments of that post and give my new opinions on them :P


Is it just me, or does COD 5 look really meh. Not just compared to COD 4, but compared to every shooter in the past year. It just looks.. Dull.

Yes. Yes that is just you.


Maybe it is me of course, I've seen millions of people salivating onto their shoes will mumbling something about Japanese guerrilla tactics but I can't see past the fact that it's set in World War 2 again. Call me old fashioned, but it's.... Old fashioned!

Can’t argue there. The World War 2 setting is old fashioned, and it certainly is dead. Dead, but not forgotten. The only reason Call of Duty: World At War manages to become something of a decent game is that it’s just Call of Duty 4 retextured. The story has been written by someone with a brain this time around, and the multiplayer is the same as it’s always been (never a bad thing!) The co-op aspects are also something of a very clever move.


Medal Of Honor died on it's arse because it kept trying and trying to make a different game but always managed to do the same thing ever time. Epic opening followed by linear levels involving about 3 Nazis every 5 steps.

Medal Of Honor did, and I blame that abysmal series for my hatred of World War 2 games. Medal of Honor Rising Sun was so god awful, it’s no wonder I wasn’t vaguely interested in World At War. However, playing COD5 has made me remember something very important. It isn’t Medal of Honor. It’s Call of Duty, which manages to completely flip the Medal of Honor method the other way around. I found on COD5 that the first level was very weak, and every level after that was superb.


I've seen COD5 in action, I've seen it with my own eyes and yes you can coo over the graphics and the flamethrowers but come on. It's just the first 3 Call Of Duty's and in my eyes, that's a very very bad thing.

It would be a bad thing if it resembled the first 3 COD games. But it doesn't. It’s more COD4, and that’s a very very GOOD thing.

But who knows, maybe I'll be eating my own words in a weeks time! Wouldn't surprise me.

Change that to three months time, and you’ll be absolutely right.


Original post

Tuesday, 6 January 2009


I’m a bit of a magazine nerd. I’ve been collecting them since I picked up a copy of CUBE in 2003 and since then, I’ve been addicted to the British Videogame Journalism industry, and would you believe it, It’s what I aspire to do when I’m older. Because you get to play games… Then write about them… Then get paid.


So anyway, I collected CUBE until the GameCube became obsolete (and it stopped being published) and moved onto ONM. Official Nintendo Magazine just so happened to be a fantastic magazine at launch. It was pretty, fun to read, and had some fantastic writers (Mainly a young man named Chandra, from CUBE fame). It was this magazine that forced me to join it’s forum, the first forum I ever joined. It was here I made some great friends, and eventually became hooked into the online forum world.


However one day, I came across another forum, and this one was called nRevolution. From here on in, it becomes something of a love story. I left ONM and had a filthy affair with nRev. It was here that I became a central part of the community, and actually made proper friends. I actually have emotional memories from that place. Sad? Perhaps, but I will always remember that place as not just a resource for Nintendo news, but also a fantastically funny, supportive and co-operative forum. Bravo.

Then, it all went to Shit, and I started nFort. At the time I thought it was because nRev had become a horrible place, and that I had become sick. But then, yesterday, I heard from a member of nFort that the last issue of the magazine was published in December. That was that. It was over.


So, Nintendo. I’m looking at you. It was never nRevolution’s fault that it slipped up from around issue 6. It was yours. You see me? You see all those dedicated members of that forum? You see those writers, who dedicated themselves to reporting to no doubt thousands of others? Well they’re what's called the hardcore market, and I don’t know whether you’ve realised this but you’ve forgotten about us. Yea, we were the ones who kept you afloat during the Gamecube years, and now look at you. Talk about pissing on the little man.


It’s only a matter of time, before a months worth of Wii reviews can be fitted onto a single A4 sheet of paper. I’m not saying there’s going to be a lack of games, it’s just that Wii games are becoming so shallow you could review them yourself just by looking at the cover art.

Monday, 5 January 2009

Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop


I loved Dead Rising on the Xbox. I thought it was genius. Flawed, but genius. One of the best Zombie games to date (you know, excluding Left 4 Dead).


Admittedly, when I heard that it was being released for Wii I was slightly excited. Dead Rising… Zombies… Wiimote… Sounds good! But then you realise that the Wii physically can’t handle THAT many Zombies, and that they’d taken out the photography aspect of the game (which was the whole point of the 360 version).


I’d forgotten about it, and no doubt when it was released I probably would have bought it. But then I saw this. Yes that’s a trailer. That’s meant to make me want to buy it.  Go watch it.


Finished? Cool. I’ll be over here, playing real games.

Sunday, 4 January 2009

Big Daddy Doll

Firstly, let me apologise for the lack of Blog’s these past few days. With new year and everything, it’s been difficult to update (also, I got quite ill after trying to kill myself by eating to much pizza. Fail).


But, I have something good to blog about. On new years eve my girlfriend had a brainwave while watching the Bioshock 2 trailer, and that idea was to make a Big Daddy Doll purely out of every day household items. The result, is the above picture. Pretty cool eh? I thought so.


So normal blogs tomorrow!

Thursday, 1 January 2009

Irony. Pure Irony

Although I'm a fan of the Xbox, I do enjoy taking the piss out of it. Yea It's harsh, because lets face it, not a lot of people like the Playstation but I do it anyway mainly to annoy my friend because (and I'm sorry to say this Ryan) he's an Xbox fanboy. So while I'm bragging about trivial things such as disk space and processors, and he retaliates with points such as better games and a better online I always get him with what can only be described as every Xbox owners worst nightmare. Red Ring of Death.

Like the flu, the yellow pages or Graham Norton it happens to everyone. It happened to me, and It's happened to him and everytime I used that argument he never had anything to say back to me. Well, nothing I'd feel comfortable about typing on my girlfriends computer anyway. 

But then last night, after my New Year celebrations, I decided to see if I could clock Mirrors Edge as I was already up to chapter 6 out of 8, so I thought I'd be able to do it. So I booted it up, started playing and then it crashed. It didn't bother me at first, because I presumed it was the disc but after four attempts on Mirrors Edge, one attempt on LittleBigPlanet (the game wouldn't load) and then an attempt on COD5 (again, the game wouldn't load) I panicked. I went straight to the Sony EU forums, and posted my problem. This morning I managed to get Mirrors Edge working, but I'm still worried about whether it's a hard drive problem.

Anyway, the whole point of this story is that when I told my friend last night, he gave a fantastic reply that I thought would be perfect for today's post.

"Definitely Sony's way of saying Happy New Year mate."