So Much Hate!

I was playing COD again tonight with some mates, and it was going OK and we were having fun, until we ended up playing Ground War with a bunch of Americans. This one kid in my party (who is often rather annoying, but he's a friend of my mates so I normally put up with him) started to swear his head off for no reason about them being American (I mean honestly, he was like Speedy Gonzales with turrets) and then this guy from our team told him to "Shut up you American C**t". Turns out the guy was Porterican but did this stop this kid? Nope, in fact he laid on the hate even more.

I ended up quitting and coming off altogether. It's just sad really, how worked up people get over something as silly as a game...

This Little Duck Hates Left 4 Dead

Hey, Terrance here. I’m back.

 

I would have posted before today, but a week after I last posted I had a bit of an accident. You see, I hate everything, but one thing I do love is bread. I adore the stuff. It’s like duck sex to me. So I was in the park, diving for some bread, when some little shit threw a donut at me. In my frenzied bread rage, I consumed the whole thing in under a second and thusly sunk to the bottom of the pond in a fashion that very much resembled a scene from the Godfather. Anyway, I saved by a passing homeless guy who thought I was a magic pond elf but the moral of this story is I couldn't be bothered… Anyway.

 

I used to quite enjoy Valves zombie shooter Left 4 Dead. In fact, you could say I actually used to… well. Like it. Anyway, I got bored of the thing fairly quickly due to the lack of campaigns and the god-awful server browser, but I still had a soft spot for the old decaying girl. So you can imagine my excitement when Barry the swan tells me that it’s going to receive free Downloadable content which will consist of two new versus campaigns and an all new “Survival mode”. Well I almost snapped both my wings off as I skidded across the ice to my laptop (It’s cold here in Dorset… I hate snow).

 

Browsing the internet, my excitement was crushed with the cold hard facts. These two “new” versus campaigns are just Death Toll and Dead Air (which should have been included on the games initial release in my opinion) and this survival mode may just be the same as the main game, just with no medipacks of pills.

 

Well I can tell you, I'm severely pissed off. Valve are normally fantastic for updates (look at Team Fortress 2) but this is just stupid.

 

Terrance out.

This Little Duck Hates Far Cry 2

 

Hey. Names Terrance. How you doing.

 

Before I start, let’s establish something. I’m a Duck. Not only am i a Duck however, I also play games. The thing is though, Duck’s are natural haters of everything (it’s true, Google it). I hate ponds, I hate dry land, I hate flying, but most of all I hate nearly every game I ever play. I’m like Yahtzee from zero punctuation, only I have a beak. Some say I'm nothing more than a metaphorical character created to release hidden hatred for videogames from someone else, but I think that’s bullshit.

 

So lately I’ve been playing Far Cry 2. Oh lord do I have problems with it. A lot of problems. For starters why is it that everyone seems to want to shoot me, and I mean everyone. I can’t drive four fucking feet before getting my face shot of by around 15 men who have been chilling at a bloody checkpoint all day, even though there’s another checkpoint about three foot up the road. It’s stupid. Also, they don’t like to die and my gun likes to jam. And fire likes to burn me. Ouch.

 

Also, the people on this game talk really fast. It’s like they can’t stop talking otherwise they’ll die. But then they do stop. And they don't die. Which is disappointing, because the missions they send me on are so repetitive I want them to drop down dead just to add a bit of variety.

 

The multiplayer's weak, all the vehicles are the same speed and always end up exploding, it crashes a lot, the buddy system works but has limited animations and the whole game is full of unlikeable characters. Also It’s made by Ubisoft.

 

I may post again, but it’s hard to type with wings. I do have a lot to say about Left 4 Dead however.

 

Ciao

 

Terrance