Haters Be Hatin’ (Also, Don’t Tell Anyone This, But I Can’t Get Away With Mass Effect)

 

I’ve received two comments recently that made me want to respond to them in an angry, angsty way. So I’m going to.

The first was this one, on my last post regarding the new Xbox 360 Slim:

Dude :L

I don't know what kind of Xbox gamers you've been looking at, but I only know one person whose anything like what you're talking about and he's fat and everyone hates him.

I know PLENTY of PS3 owners who would argue that LittleBigPlanet is better than life itself, let alone Gears Of War.

You are biased :Z
I do not like this blog anymore.

First of all. Biased? Please look at these two images. I will label them Fig.1 and Fig.2:

 Fig.1: My PS3 collection, I count eleven games.

Fig.2: My Xbox Collection. Trust me, it makes my PS3 weep.

This year is going to be an incredible year for Xbox, and already it’s surfaced as a console that has a solid grounding within the industry. All generations have at least one that defines the medium. Once upon a five years ago it was the Ps2. Now, it’s the Xbox 360.

I love my Xbox. As a console it’s superb, and in comparison with my Ps3 which is still broken, it’s proven to be more faithful.

I’m not being biased my dear, I'm being critical. It’s what I do. I’m an opinionated teenage web logger. It’s not my purpose to just accept things for what the majority believes them to be.

And if you can’t take a bit of criticism? Well then perhaps it’s better for you to go elsewhere. Meanwhile I’ll be playing Alan Wake, Crackdown 2 and Heavy Rain, enjoying the best of both worlds.

Next up!

Last time I checked, past two years Sony have had more exclusives than Microsoft...you know if you actaully delve around and find stuff out.

Yea, for the past two years Sony have had more exclusives than Microsoft. I fail to see your point? This year Sony showed off far less than Microsoft in terms of hard hitting, action packed exclusives that got the crowd going. In fact if i’m being honest, both companies had very little to show off in terms of exclusives. They certainly didn’t show us anything we didn’t already know about.

Moving on!

I’ve been trying to so hard to play Mass Effect. I’ve been trying to get through it for a fortnight and today I finally decided I couldn’t, and I have to give up.

Now before you start laying on the hate, I appreciate how God damn amazing Mass Effect truly is. As a game, it’s superb. Damn near perfect, with it’s incredible graphics, innovate game play mechanics, fully realised, atmospheric settings and believable (albeit, alien) characters. Not only that, but it’s the best RPG game I’ve ever played, to boot.

But I can’t get away with it, because it’s too deep. See, when I first play RPG’s they need to do two things. They need to introduce character, settings and narrative within the first hour in order to make me want to play for the next fifty, and secondly they need to clearly explain how I play it properly like any other game would. A tutorial mission, or a training session, for example. Not hidden away within the behemoth that is Mass Effects “Codex” section.

See, my problem is that Mass Effect has so much going for it, that you need to read about half of it within the previously mentioned codex section for it to make any sense. For most people that’s fine, great even, but it’s not for me. I can’t necessarily enjoy games that present me with such a mammoth task. It’s why I’ve never been a fan of RPG’s.

Combine it with the lengthy dialogue sections and I just had to raise my arms in defeat. I want to like Mass Effect. Hell, everyone else does and I can see why they do. There’s just something inside me that says it’s not worth it. I can appreciate why it's so good. I can see why it’s received so much critical acclaim. In fact I’ll be the last person to say I dislike it. However, I will be the first person to say that I don’t have the time, nor the patience for it.

Still, it took me three attempts to get past Megaton on Fallout 3, and I eventually learnt to love that…

There’s always hope, folks.

Leave your hate within the comments section below.

Bewbs

Today I witnessed three sets of virtual boobs. All of which, left me feeling dirty all over.

The first was on a video someone sent me of the new PS3 cinematic thriller Heavy Rain. I’ve been fairly interested in it, so I was glad that there was new footage out there that I haven’t seen. Turns out it was of the main character showering. How fun. On another note, you have to wave your controller up and down to dry her off. I’m feeling a bit put off by this game now…

The second was Mass Effect 2, in which the woman above pounced Captain Shepherd in what looked like an engine room. It was embedded within an article on CVG about Fox News’s reaction to the sex scenes within the first Mass Effect. I watched it thinking it was about the outrage. I was mistaken.Thing is, all I could think about was how the hell did she get her suit off in the first place? I mean… It’s metal isn’t it? If it isn’t then what the hell does she reflect bullets with?

 

Third was this thing on Conkers Bad Fur Day. I think I’ve been put off games all together now.

Once Again, I Return

You know, funny story about where I’ve been for the past week. Mainly, working on this very website for my media project. Yea bad excuse but I just haven’t really had time to update.

Anyway I’ll fill you in on what I’ve been up too. First of all, I bought WET on the PS3 expecting a fantastic Tarantino inspired running – gunning, hacking – slashing epic of a game. Instead, I got a mediocre game that I would be ashamed to pass off as a PS2 title. I’ll do a full (and pretty damn harsh) review tomorrow or Wednesday. In short, it’s been traded in come Saturday. What a load of tosh.

Secondly, I’ve been experimenting with a few more free-to-play games on the PC. I’ve been trying out League of Legends (Warcraft 3 inspired defence strategy game, which is surprisingly addictive, accessible and very good fun online) and have just downloaded Face of Mankind tonight which… well I know nothing about it but a few people have recommended it so I thought I’d get it. A friend said he’d walk me through it at some point this week so I’ll give an opinion on that soon.

Apart from that… Erm. Mass Effect 2 is making people giddy at college, Assassins Creed 2 is a hugely enjoyable game and Borderlands just never ends! Which is a good thing.

Mass Effect

It’s no secret I’m not a die hard fan of the RPG genre. In fact, I often find them quite boring. So why I bought Mass Effect today is an answer that’s beyond my expertise. It' dosn’t make sense why I did it.

Still, I played an hour of it today and I enjoyed it. Quite a lot actually. It’s pretty simple to understand the game play (often on RPG’s I just end up staring at the screen, dribble running down my chin) and the real time combat is extremely fun to mess around with.

 

I’m off to play some now actually :)