An Offer I Can't Refuse

Ok so this has been circulating the Internet for a while now but, man this is such a good deal. Two games that look quite frankly amazing (I'm a firm believer that Uncharted 2 will be game of the year) in a bundle that kicks arse.

So getting!

Gears Of.... Cancer?

Me and a friend were playing through the original Gears of War today on split screen co-op. I kept dying and was joking on about how he must get irritated playing co-op games with me (We regularly play them online and offline). He turned to me, and in all seriousness, said:

"Playing games with you is like contracting a form of cancer"

I wept.

Beyond Good and Evil

I mentioned this in passing yesterday, and couldn't believe that I've never mentioned it before today. Beyond Good and Evil is not just one of the most underrated games ever made. It is THE most underrated game ever made.

As wikipedia so wonderfully sums up the basic story:

Beyond Good and Evil takes place on the futuristic planet of Hillys, where a mix of human,anthropomorphic animal, alien, and robotic species co-exist. The planet is under siege by alien DomZ forces. The DomZ abduct beings on Hillys, and either drain their life force for their own, or implant them with spores that convert them into creatures that work for the DomZ. A militant force called the "Alpha Sections" emerges to defend the populace. However, the Alpha Sections have a mysterious secret hiding beneath their helmets. An underground group ofjournalists, the IRIS Network, attempt to uncover the secrets of the DomZ and the Alpha Sections and expose the truth to the population of Hillys.

You follow Jade, a photo journalist / adoptive parent / all out wonderwoman who joins the underground IRIS network as mentioned above. What follows is one of the most magnificent stories ever told in a videogame and an experience that you'll never forget. This game just oozes with charm, which is just what you'd expect from it's writer and developer Michel Ancel (that's the creator of Rayman, the developer of the fantastic King Kong and more recently the Raving Rabbids series) . It's one of those great, beautiful game that you never forget. It's an experience, a life affirming at that. You walk away feeling.... fulfilled, at peace. Yes, the gameplay can at times be frustrating and some of the sections are bland but give me a world that can combine fascists space oppression and talking animals, blended within a narrative surrounding photojournalism and religious connotations and I'll not only eat my hat but my shoes as well.

If you haven't played this game, and I presume a lot of you fall into this category, get yourself to eBay and be enlightened. Especially seeing as the sequel is currently in development.

Assasins Creed

This had so much potential. So, so much potential. A sandbox game set during the Third Crusade, in which the player must assassinate one person in a crowd of hundreds? Where the player could leap from building to building, clamber up them like a male Lara Croft and perform THAT leap of a huge tower? Freedom, brutality and beauty. It had everything. Then Ubisoft added more, and it was ruined.

Oh yea guys, it was a science fiction story. Unlocking the memories of the characters ancestors, evil cooperation.... yea you get it. Why? Because you've played it, read it and watched it a million times before. As if this wasn't bad enough, it then became an excuse for invisible walls, to move the narrative on without explanation and to get away with the fact that a man who grew up in Jerusalem in 1191  mysteriously has a thick American accent. No lads, that's not called a clever plot device, that's called laziness.

I still stand by the fact that this game could have been something really special, but instead it just became another run of the mill action game. 

Ubisoft? A word of warning. You so much as let the developers of this drivel near Beyond Good and Evil 2 and I'll be hunting you down. All of you. Even Jade Raymond. 

Even Jade Raymond.

A Little, Slightly Less Bigger, Planet

So today Stephen Fry said that he'd been voice acting for LittleBigPlanet on the PSP. Anyone else ridiculously exited over this portable version of an already well established classic?

Thoughts on a postcard. Or you know, if you're lazy, in the comments box.

Christ, I Suck At Games

I started Fallout 3 again this morning, like from the start. Within an hour, I had passed the point I had been horrendously stuck on since Christmas in less than an hour and a half.

I that doesn't prove how bad I am at games, I don't know what will :P

Oh They're Gonna Have To Glue You Back Together... IN HELL

Team Fortress 2 is on the top of my list lately of games I'm enjoying. I've been focusing on playing servers that are dedicated to a vanilla rotation, or ones that are 2fort only. I've also just been laying as classes that have been left untouched. Mainly the Demoman and Solider. 

I want the old days back D:

Fable 2

In response to a request I received a few days ago, here is my definitive first impressions of a game which deserves everyone's time. A game of such depth, such passion and such epic storytelling.

Today, I got an achievement because when I fart in game, my dog buries it's snout into it's paws and stares at me disgusted. I also got another one, because now the town cryer in Oakwood refers to me as "Nobhead". Is there anything else I need to comment on?

Fable 2 looks at the traditional RPG genre, stares it in great detail, then says "Fuck it" and goes off and does it's own thing. Yea it has a traditional real time combat system, experience points and upgrades etc. but that's as far as it goes. Fable 2 is well aware that it's an RPG, so it certainly doesn't spend a lot of time focusing on it. Instead, it focuses on making it something that a lot of games these days aren't. Fun. One minute you'll be on an epic quest to save a man's child from an underground lair. At the first sight of blood, this man vomits. Deeply disturbing. Next second, you're being followed round by a brummie songwriter. Deeply hilarious.

Every feature of this game oozes professionalism, and there's nothing I can really say against it other than sometimes the controls feel clunky and that's not a valid complaint (Unless i'm referring to Killzone). This is certainly a game that gets my hearty recommendation. Not game of the year, but an exceptionally pleasant experience. 

It's A Beautiful Game

ArmA is a game I have yet to have the privilege of playing . I get recommendations left right and centre, but I've just never actually got round to playing it. A good friend mine however, here's looking at you Graham, is certainly persistent but in a completely different way. He keeps sending me some of the most beautiful and emotional machinimas (hell, I'll just say videos) that I've ever seen. 

This is certainly one of the best :)

Disappointment…

Another week, and yet more disappointment. Peggle is STILL not on the Playstation store. When will Sony acknowledge my disappointment? :(

 

Probably never…. I mean look at Firmware 2.7

 

*sighs*

Random News

Can't think of anything specific to blog about today, so I'll just blather on about whatever comes to mind, as I usually do.

Started playing Fable 2 a few nights ago and I'm rather enjoying it. It carries the same humour as other Lionhead / Bullfrog titles which is always nice, as it's a kind of humour that I would consider as still rather fresh and exciting.  The graphics are sweet and I rather like the combat system. Only complaint I have, at the moment, is that the controls are rather sluggish but maybe that's just due to my complete inability to play Xbox games.

Burn Zombie Burn is still as addictive as it was yesterday. Incredibly hard, but great fun. 

Worms is also taking over. The online mode is the best idea since... Oh I dunno, I'm all out of interesting analogy's... :P

I borrowed a fresh copy of Bioshock yesterday as well, as seem as though the one I was playing decided it didn't like anyone progressing any further than Ryan Industries >.<>

Also, does anyone know whether the Dsi is any good? We were thinking of getting one for my sister, seeing as her original one broke the other day (and subsequently, she's therefore nicked mine o.o)

And on that note of petty theft, I leave you. 

Burn Zombie Burn

Who remembers Smash TV? Oh good, a few of you. OK, so who enjoyed it? You did? Then I have a game that you'll love... 

My Playstation Network addiction has hit it's peak I think, and this is certainly the cream of the crop. Burn Zombie Burn is Deadly addictive, incredibly fun and deeply entertaining. Thousands of zombies, incredible weapons, a fantastic reward / resource system and of course lots and lots of gore!

I would recommend this to anyone who loves to play simple and deadly addictive arcade games in short bursts. It's became my number one timewaster as of late. I've been playing it between sessions of Fable 2 and Bioshock :)

The Legend Of Spyro

Oh my God yes. A thousand times yes. A Spyro movie!?!? Yes. Yes, yes, yes. 

If this is, in any way, based on the original three games then I'm going to be there at the freaking PREMIERE. Honest, you all have my word!

Dance Dance Revolution

I forgot how much I love these. Me and a mate were on them today, I was loving it! There’s something oddly satisfying about making a complete twat of oneself in public.

 

For the record, I was crap at it :P

Worms

This was, without a doubt, one of my all time favourite games as a child. Hours upon hours of my childhood life were poured into this brilliant game, and my God was it worth it.

So when I realised yesterday that there was a HD remake of this on the Playstation store, well I'd have  be a fool not to jump at the chance to relive my past experiences. For all those who care, the remake is as good if not better than the original. Did I hear online play? I did! Well lucky me!

MM... Oh?

I'm sure it was Ayn Rand, or was it Neitzche, who said "Show me an MMO that doesn't bore my nuts off and I'll eat my own feet".  Perhaps it was me, but never mind. The point remains the same. 

You see, I've played them all. I've prowled the City of Heroes, I've fought in the Guild Wars, I've attempted Eve Online, lived in the Age of Conan and braved the power that is behind the mighty World of Warcraft and to be honest, I didn't enjoy any of them.

Well OK. They all appealed to me in some way because let's face it, I wouldn't have played them otherwise. Age of Conan particularly so, mainly because I'm a fan of the lore behind them (Robert E. Howard ftw...) but... I dunno. It just always ends up the same. Grind.

I just don't see the appeal in the tedious and mundane task that is grinding. I mean, I do enough of that in everyday life. I don't play games to sit and bore myself to Ecstasy, I play them to excite me to.... wait I've gone too sexual here and I've forgot my point. Oh yea, I don't play games to be bored, I play them to have fun.

So anyway, the point of this post is despite my dislike for all things MMO, is there a one out there that I may actually enjoy?

Zero Punctuation: Halo Wars

Best Opening To A Videogame Ever

I could never, EVER get tired of this. Best opening to a videogame ever. Fact....

Too…. Many…. Games… D:

A mate of mines went on holiday for a fortnight, and he’s left for me a stack of Xbox 360 games to play while he’s gone. These include (deep breath needed, reader): Assassins Creed, Bioshock, Left 4 Dead, Gears of War, Dead Space, Fable 2, Grid, PGR4 and Flatout: Ultimate Carnage.

 

I have a LOT to play xD

Oh Bother

I’m addicted, again.

 

*sighs*

Left 2 Dead

Discovered today that the Xbox Version of this can be played online split-screen so me and a mate, being the old fashioned gamers that we are, decided to give it a go.

 

It was great fun. We played a full Versus game of No Mercy, me as the infected and a friend as the survivors. It was brilliant fun. However, on the last section I was pulled off a ledge by a smoker. No biggy, happens all the time. So Zoey comes to pull me up…. and walks off the edge. So now she needs saving. So Francis comes over to help. And does the same thing. Then Bill get’s pounced by the hunter.

 

Mum’s were mentioned guys. Mums.

Discworld Noir

My Dad got another copy of this today! I can’t wait to start playing it again. It’s by far, hands down, one of the greatest stories ever told in a videogame. I love it to bits! It’s Terry Pratchett at his best, and that’s saying something!

 

Me and a mate are gonna install it on my laptop tomorrow night and just get it all done on Sunday :) It’s gonna rock!

Updates, Updates, Updates…

I came home this evening and decided, like I do every Thursday, to check the Playstation store for goodies for me to purchase. As I booted it up, it informed that an update had become available. “The rumored glory of Version 2.7?” I hear you roar? The very same.

 

So I sat and waited for it download (40 minutes spent reading “Making History” by Stephan Fry is certainly not time wasted), and by the time it had finished I was literally frothing with excitement. Were the rumors true? Has Sony finally upgraded their online community to a level that could directly challenge Xbox Live? Has Sony’s day finally come, and together me and my Sony brethren will traverse the plains of this generation, and take the crown from Microsoft's head!?!

 

No. Basically, the rumors were bull turd. All it added was this really quite poor instant messaging service. Also, Peggle still isn’t on the Playstation store.

 

Then I went on the Xbox and that needed to update too. Then I lost all my Dead Rising saves.

 

Basically, I’m pretty fucking fed up if I’m honest xD

The Humorous Dead

The last time I played Dead Rising was about… well almost a year ago I think. Yea about that. I loved it, but got stuck about an hour of the way in (the second case strand, if anyone's interested). Anyway, I only realise now (and bearing in mind I got this yesterday, which proves how little I played it the last time) that I only teetered on the edge that is Zombie Hell.

 

Ok, I understand that I’m three years behind and that everyone and their mother has finished Dead Rising but I don’t care. There is nothing more satisfying than smacking a zombie over the head with a frying pan, kicking him in the face and then mowing him down with a lawnmower. Honest, there just REALLY isn’t!

 

It’s made me hungry for Dead Rising 2 if I’m honest. The only thing that’s bothering me is, do I get it for Xbox or PS3?

 

Answers on a postcard.